I just got back. Sigh.

I have a lot to say, but unfortunately I am extremely tired, so I won't be able to type a long post. I just got back from SF; my family was there all day. It was fun, but tiring. I got a new trashcan, a comforter, slippers, and a book. I really like the book. It is called The Memory Keeper's Daughter, by Kim Edwards. I am completely addicted; I'm already almost a fourth of the way done. I hate that. I buy a book and read it right away. I never know how to pace myself; I'm like that in a race, too. I go out way too hard and then am tired. I let out this burst of energy when doing something. I can never do things reasonably. When I get enthralled with something, I obsess. Anyway, today was good, but tiring. Yesterday I was rudely awakened quite early (.... like 8...) for some reason. We had to get ready for my sister's basketball game, which wasn't even until 10:30 or something. It lasted a while, then we had snacks and drove home. They won, so that's good I suppose. And yesterday was another day that my parents were earnestly trying to get me to decide what I want to do. Well, my mother is telling me that English is retarded. Which got me passionately mad, and now all I really want to do is English. My dad calmed me down a bit; he told me to do what I want. He defended my position. He just told me I needed to be thinking. So that's what I did yesterday. But I then thought about how materialistic everyone is. And today in Sunday school I was pretty pleased with the conversation, which touched on my very thoughts from yesterday. Does it really matter if you make a whole lot of money? I mean, is it better to do something that you dislike and get paid a lot? Or is it better to do something you like, yet not get paid much? I would certainly say the latter, but too many people say the first one. Like my uncle. I sigh at things like this. Of course, this is all very well in theory, just thinking about it. But what happens when it comes time to really practice what I'm preaching here? I mean, would I really enjoy a low salary? It would certainly be nice to have money. But money is NOT that important! Arg. I was extremely dissettled yesterday. More than mildly perturbed. I was upset at the fact that my own mother is not satisfied with her job. She says she'd like it more if it paid more. I was also upset at the fact that I am so undecisive. I like being creative. I really like it. I'm realizing I tend to like abstract things more than concrete things. Math is boring. Proving things. Q.E.D. Woo. Okay. Well, let's list things I enjoy. I enjoy laughter. That comes to mind first. I enjoy children. Kids. Young people. (A, they're funny, and B, they are so full of enthusiasm and energy). I enjoy creativity. I enjoy acomplishing things. I enjoy interacting with people. I enjoy beautiful things. I enjoy funny things. There is so much more I enjoy, but I can guarantee you that chemistry is not on there. Nor is probobility. Math in general is pretty distasteful to me these days. So I am not declaring anything yet. Not at all. But I am thinking. Not constantly thinking; there is no constant forboding lurking in my mind. But I will occasionally keep evaluating how things are going. Yesterday I, upset and depressed for some vague reason, asked my mom after she told me to get a good job, "Well, what defines a good job??" And she paused and said that it is different for different people. I want to hear from the reader. What would you answer to the bolded part of my post? I am not distraught anymore; I know that everything will all work out in the end. I am just pensive. Woo. We have tomorrow off. I can sleep in... and do homework that I conveniently put off... ah well.