SO long.. and, "so long"

Okay. I’ve been telling everyone that I’m going to go work on my essay right now. Well, know what? I’m lying. I’m writing, but it’s not my essay. I’m writing a post, and I suspect it might be quite long. It’s going to help me figure out my thoughts as I go. And at the end, I might just come to the conclusion that I’m going to have to be a copy-cat (like always), but I will inevitably get to that and explain more. Well, I don’t know why, but it seems like an eternity since my last post. I have no clue why I feel like that, but I do. I don’t even remember what I last wrote about. (By the way, I’m feeling kind of lazy, so don’t expect this to be nice and neat and separated into paragraphs; it will be scrambled and mixed up, just like my weary brain). Well. Well, well, well. Where to begin. The last time I wrote, I think it was something about, um, my sickness? I think. Yeah, it was some stupid dramatic thing. I really did feel rather like crap, but it was certainly overly spruced with drama. Yeah. Not in the mood today, folks. So, fact is, I’m feeling better, I guess. My throat’s still bugging me, but I really don’t feel like I have a fever or anything. Enough about my health; it really is quite uninteresting. Instead, here’s another fact: everyone, students and teachers alike, are getting fed up. Fact is, we’re tired. And irate. Overall, stressed, pissed, and not terribly chipper. Maybe I’m biased, but the general consensus of people that I’ve talked to/ observed is that everyone is ready for spring break. I for one am very, very ready. I think I’m ready for more than that. Ready for a break from being Sherri. Of course, that’s completely fanciful (one of my greater qualities is my knack for stating the obvious), but still, I can dream. Well, one more day. One more day, and then at least I will be away from here, for at least a little while. I certainly won’t be away from reality though; in fact, I will be right in reality’s face, as I am going to go look at a few colleges. Yeah. Well, no matter. I’m strangely not worried about tomorrow in the slightest. Well, maybe in the slightest. But just ever so slightly. I mean, right now, I ought to be writing my T.S. Eliot essay, which, if I worked as hard as I should, should take me about.. oh.. 2 hours, maybe? If I had more days, I would probably take even longer than that on it, but alas, I have a limited number of hours in which to work. Anyway, I have an essay, precal hw, stats hw, studying for precal, and studying for bio. Among other things. And, so, yes, I will probably be up very, very late, and will most likely get only a sparse few hours of sleep, but, you know what? Who really cares. I just have to push through today.. /tomorrow.. Well, think I’m done yet? You’re wrong if you think so; I’m just getting started. I really don’t know what to say as far as this next important thing goes, so… maybe I won’t say it, just yet. Instead, I’ll ramble through my insane day. I swear, someone’s out to get me.. Pretty much today everything was.. not how it should be. Life went on exactly the same, mundane way as always in this tiny, broken, pathetic little town… and yet.. things were drastically different. Turned sideways. Things were wacked. Alright. I somehow miraculously got up at 5:30ish. Jumped in the shower. Jumped out. Ate breakfast, for once (frootloops). Sped to school. Wait, I stopped at starbucks for a mocha. Parked. Walked through the freezing cold wind to English, where Ms. B. miraculously was. She must seriously get there 2 hours before school starts.. holy crap. So I walk in, and say, “Wow, holy crap.. are you always here this early??” She said, “Yeah, I try to get here about this time everyday. I like to come and get work done; it’s easier to work when no one’s here.” And I said, “You mean when we noisy kids aren’t here..” And she kind of smiled and nodded. I told her I was going to go get help in precal, even though I loathe that place. So I ran off to precal, and was honestly shocked out of my mind to find the door unlocked. So, I walked in, and we went through my old test. I was in her room for over. An. Hour. It was insane. In English we presented our posters, and she said our symbolism was good. I didn’t really talk much to her today. In precal I attempted to learn. In stats I didn’t. During lunch I was an idiot and took a precal test. I was late to yearbook. Yearbook was okay; I finished my project and it looks mighty fine. I’m really excited. Oh yeah, and I walked around with Simone and got crazy footage for the DVD.. insane!! But not as insane as what happened after school. (Wow, this is getting long, huh? I really am a procrastinator.. I should be working on my essay!! I’ll try to wrap it up, but believe me, this is long for a reason). So basically I walked to my car. I said goodbye to my friends, yadda yadda. Then—great. Where’re my keys? I dumped my backpack out searching… couldn’t find ‘em. I ran back over the overpass. I saw Mr. M, and decided to stalk him to see if he would take me to Ms. B., but instead he went into Easton’s. I then went to Mrs. S’s room… locked. Then, starting to hyperventilate slightly, I went to the office. No keys were found, but I should try again in the morning. Well, that’s just great, I thought, and wandered into the IMC. There, I attempted to catch my bearings. I mean, all day things were, as I said earlier, … not right. I mean, Ms. B. was all distant and stressed. She wasn’t mean.. no. But she wasn’t completely herself. She’s stressed; we all are. I certainly am…. And Mrs. S. was being nice.. that’s certainly different. And then, after stats… that was really unnerving to see my ex-boyfriend and some #$%^*!@%. Wait. Let’s try that again… with some $*!@. No, no.. let’s try this ONE more time: … with some… girl. Yes. With some girl. Moving on……… Back to the keys. So I was in the IMC, trying to make my head stop spinning, and so I flung my backpack down by a computer, and headed towards the bathroom. I was going to go to the sink and splash some cold water on my face to calm me down, but there was some chick in there, kind of just standing there, looking like she was waiting. So, I just went into a stall. Well, I quickly jumped back, as the toilet was kind of overflowing with some revolting gunk and I’mnotgoingintodetails. Sooo.. I went into the NEXT stall, which I found to be satisfactory.. or at least not oozing disgusting stuff… I came out, washed my hands, and then my mouth felt completely arid, so I got a nice gulp of water from the fountain. After that gulp, I felt I had things semi under control, and I went to go sit down at a computer to think. Well, just as I logged in, the lady said, “time to log out; we’re closing.” I groaned and clicked ‘log out’ as I picked up my backpack. I sat outside the IMC thinking awhile. I finally resolved to go back to my car and look for the spare key. After about 15 or more minutes of groping the underside of my car (not actually a pleasant experience, by the way..), I was grimy and forlorn. I called Kelsey. We talked. I ran to p-wing. I pounded on the door. I pounded on the other door. Finally, finallllllly, after about a million billion eons, Sarah’s mom came and let me in. We called Jesus (ha ha, as I’m typing this, I realize this sounds completely insane and completely ridiculously hilarious). Jesus is the janitor. Jesus let me in to the computer lab. Just as I looked about the room crestfallen, I spotted my coat hanging sad and alone on a faded yellow chair. I ran to it, and yes.. there were my keys, too. I thanked Sarah’s mom. And I thanked Jesus. Ha ha. That works. I sped out of the parking lot, and stopped jerkily at starbucks. There, I saw a woman with my first name, and my ex-boyfriend’s last name. Hm….. *snaps out of it * Anyway, she looked at me and said, “hey. What’s on your face?” I related the story quickly. And paid for my drink and left. I sped home, where sat at my computer and imed… someone for a very, very long time. It was pretty crazy. It wore me out, drained me emotionally. Yes, I’m drained. I’ve decided. Drained physically (tennis and sickness and tiredness). Drained intellectually (precal today… made my brain fizzle out into nothingness). And drained emotionally (not even going to go there). Well. Well well well. I have now come to what I think is the end of my post. And so therefore I must say this news. I have demonstrated that can certainly be a copycat. And certainly am, a lot of the time. Well, I am going to be one once again, for hopefully one of the last times. Anyway, what I mean is this: One of my friends is no longer going to keep updating his blog as frequently as he usually does. Well, I’ve decided that that is quite a good idea. I’ve mentioned the fact that I was toying with the idea that I might get rid of this blog, and perhaps start a new one, an anonymous one. For now, though, I’m going to keep it. But I’m going to do an experiment. I’m going to see if I can go without it. Kind of like fasting, you might say. I want to prove to myself that I can deal with change, and that sometimes things will be shaken up. Well, I’m shaking things up. This will be probably the longest post I have ever written, and most likely the last one for a while. Besides, it won’t be so bad…I mean, people that I’ve been talking to.. well, they don’t really read this anymore anyway. So I doubt I’ll disappoint very much at all. I just need to get through tomorrow. Then I’ll be gone for a week. Rejuvenated? Maybe. Different? Well, yes. Like I’ve said before, everyone is always changing. No one… nothing… is ever the same for an instant. Life is motion.. change… maybe that’s what I need. Okay. Enough procrastinating. Enough BS. Goodbye, reader.